God is > My Past

"God is greater than my past."

Without knowing how to get a grip on my past, I could be doomed to live my whole life with the past having a grip on me; especially when it comes to my body image and losing weight. I find that I can’t open myself up to the possibility of being used by God in the present moment because I am consumed with quilt, remorse, and shame over things that are buried in my past.

The voices that brainwashed me seem to speed up from behind me and at times, roar louder than my present faith. I glance back in the rear view mirror and can’t take my mind’s eye off of those painful memories. I loose my way or miss God’s sign posts toward mountains of joy.

I cannot change my past but I can change my response with my past! When the shame and guilt from my past threatens to rain on the joy of today, I don’t see the detour God created just for that deep gully or jarring speed bump.

God is > my past sins

Psalms 103:2-5; 12
Praise the LORD, my soul, and forget not all his benefits - who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s..... as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

Micah 7:18-19
Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy. You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea.

Corrie Ten Boom – “God hurls our sins into the depths of the sea and then He erects a “NO FISHING” sign.


I need to pay attention to the signs that God puts in front of my eyes (John 1:29, II Cor. 5:17). The Gospel is not simply “ good advice”; it is good news! Every saint that we read about in the scriptures (Moses to Paul) had a past filled with faults, weaknesses, and sins. They were sinners with a future. Their road led ahead and they followed God’s signs and His Word into eternity. They were in relationship with a God that was greater than their past.

Below are my notes from a sermon but I don't remember where, when, or who:

"God is greater than my past wounds. Jesus is the ultimate example of Life beyond severe wounds. God’s plan of salvation through Christ, who was tortured and taunted, shows that God is greater than what is done to me, what was done to Christ. I was treated as worthless but through the Cross, God says that I am worth everything. I was neglected but God says that I am treasured. I was used and abused but God says I can be healed. (Isah 53:5; II Cor. 3:18)

Because He is greater than my past, my past can serve me instead of ruling over me.

There is a story of a family whose 200 year old pear tree was blown over. When a neighbor asked the grandfather what he was going to do, he said, “I’m going to pick the fruit and burn the rest.”
 

There is wisdom to be gleaned from my past; there are things to be learned. In doing this, learning from God’s signposts about places I have been before – my past becomes redemptive. I pick the fruit because I do not want to binge again just because I am experiencing a feeling that is overwhelming.

If I can shed spotlights of truth on the potholes or temptations ahead, then I can let God show me around them. This is why I have to write out my feelings – they are part of a past that threatens to overtake me and that keeps me from living life freely and healthy.


I share these daily struggles with the view in my mirror, to show my past can be be redeemed; something that can be shared instead of something that is buried. My past can serve me and it does not have to rule over me.
 

II Cor. 1:3-4 “ God comforts us in all of our troubles so that we might be comfortable.”Is that what he said? NO! God guides us, comforts us so that we may comfort others. It is not my story anymore - once I make it through the rough, rocky road of weight loss.




My past needs to be a resource to be shared instead of a secret to be buried. It will become like salvation’s bumper sticker, telling others to take heart because if God can save, use and redeem a person like me, than God can be greater than anyone's past. God can take the shame and failures of my past and turn it into a testimony for His purpose. This story of my gleaning the good fruit from a dead tree hopefully will be a testimony and give others hope when past regrets and endless dead ends block the way down God’s highway that He created with such love - just for you and I."

I know that there are steps in OA that will also help me deal with my past constructively, with God's help. I pray that I will soon be willing and able to start those steps.

Lord, God almighty, thank you for letting me come before you sinless, saved. Forgive my unbelief when it comes to your power to forgive - your amazing grace. Please guide me on this new road away from my past and into the future. Help me to know what to leave behind and what to keep; what can be used to your glory and what is dead weight needing to be cut off. In the name of my Redeemer, I pray, Amen.